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That’s it. I’m out. I am officially on vacation until next Wednesday. Some people, like Penelope, make certain that their blog is covered for vacations. Not me. I may post and I may not. That’s the point of a vacation – I have no idea what I’m going to do. I may even take a day trip all by myself to take pictures and just r-e-l-a-x. I’ve been a bit tense lately. You probably hadn’t noticed.

So. I was flipping through my blog stats and I noticed that I had crazy hits on this post. It was a silly post about my weekend in St. Louis and the puppies my cousin was raising until they were old enough to go to their new homes. The search term was always “puffies.” Hmm. I thought maybe it was a neopet or some other Internet fad.

No, it’s boobs. Specifically it refers to nipples (not safe for work). Fantastic.

All Time

Title Views
Dream a little dream of me … 197 More stats
Reason #391 Kansas Sucks 184 More stats
About 148 More stats
I’ll be standing here beside myself 133 More stats
fluppy puffies! 126 More stats

Only my Kansas sucks post and the getting-stabbed-in-a-dream post are more popular. The standing-beside-myself post comes up when people are looking for ways to cheat a programming assignment. (The answer isn’t there, kids. Sorry to disappoint. Do your own damn homework)

Tonight I decided to take the c-a-t to get her nails trimmed. If you don’t know the back story on TFC, flip through the categories. There’s a reason I don’t do it myself – namely, she is an insane, half-feral monster. Three nights ago I set the carrier in the living room and put one of my t-shirts in it. It sounds stupid, but if I set it out ahead of time, it’s easier to coax her into it when it’s time to take her.

It’s like she knows. I swear she can read my mind. Actually, I forgot about it today. I ran errands after work (and after working out) and when I got home TFC was winding herself around my legs and being all cute and cuddly. Until I remembered that I was supposed to take her to the groomer. No sooner had the thought jumped into my brain than the cat ran. I caught her, picked her up and she growled. Never a good sign. I also accidentally had her tail trapped between us (she hates hates hates to have her tail messed with). So she started squirming. At that point she got her claws caught on my watch, twisted completely out of my arms and ran. Again.

So I left her alone for about 30 minutes and the next time I walked by her, I just reached down and scooped her up. Then I dumped her in the carrier and she was too surprised to fight me. She did fight the metal carrier door, though. She also tried to gnaw her way through the metal bars.

She fights the vet every time I take her and they have had to sedate her to do an exam (and it still took two people to hold her down). But for some reason she’s usually cool at the groomer’s. Not this time. This time she made the groomer turn the carrier on end to dump her out. She still didn’t go easily. She did the stiff-leg trick that kids try to pull on their parents. Remember the t-shirt? She had her claws in that, holding on for dear life and she fell in a heap onto the table. The groomer had to detach the shirt before she could do anything. I should have had my camera.

I got my smile fixed. I have one last little adjustment on Monday but in the meantime, I have sparkling, pretty, even teeth.

I may go out tomorrow and smile at everyone I see.

Or maybe just the cute chicks.