You know how I’m always saying that attitude is everything? How I insist that if I act like I’m happy, then I will be happy and I will bring good things into my life? I think I’m going to call bullshit on that – at least in part.
When I think about my life, I’m sometimes amazed by the timing of events. If x happened 5 minutes later than y .. then z would ≠ 0. (All that algebra is fucking with my head, too)
I had planned to go to school this morning and then go to the grocery store this afternoon. Had I stuck to that plan, I would not have been in a certain intersection at a certain time. Instead, I decided to go home after school and take a nap – I’ve been so tired lately that my brain has become sharp as soup.
On the way, I made an executive decision not to turn at one cross street (because another car was opposite me at the stop sign and I would have had to wait for him to clear the intersection before I could turn. Impatience kills) but to go to the next street. A car coming west hit the sign just as I did, going east. About 5 seconds after we both stopped, another car coming west stopped at the same stop sign. So, the first car drove through the intersection and then it was my turn because I was there well before the second car. I was in the intersection making the turn (to my left) when I saw the second car roll forward. I hit the gas, trying to complete the turn before he hit me. It was a great plan – it just didn’t work.
The first picture shows the point of impact – which proves it was his fault. If we had started forward at the same time, he would have hit my front quarter panel. The second picture shows how badly he fucked up my ride. The guy leaning on the silver car (I think it was a Charger, but I’m not sure) was the first car through the intersection and he came back to make sure no one was hurt. The guy with his back to the camera is the jack-off who hit me – and his Ford Explorer is in the background, with not a scratch on it.
The first thing he said to me is that he thought it was his turn, but he was looking at the Charger because it was such a cool car. Yeah. Whoopsie. Then he told me he thought his insurance was expired. He was right about that. When the cop finally showed up, he asked me what my deductible was. I don’t actually have a deductible. My car is so old that I just carry liability (which, for my European friends, means that if I am responsible for an accident, my insurance will pay for the other car but not for mine). But for once I had the presence of mind to say, “$500!” The guy who hit me gave it to me on the spot – in cash. The cop kept his license and he went to the bank to get the cash. The bright side is that he got a ticket for no insurance, plus a ticket for hitting me, and he paid me the $500.
At least I got that much out of him. He was very busy telling me that he didn’t have any money and that he wasn’t working and that his heat had been turned off and that he was behind on his rent. Basically, what that means is if I want my car fixed, I’ll have to get a lawyer and sue him.
He followed me to a near-by body shop so that I could get an estimate of the cost to fix it. Guess what? My little piece of junk is totalled – it will cost more to fix it than it is worth. *sigh*
The guy told me to call him and he would pay whatever it cost to get my car driveable – yeah, right. So he left. Then the auto body guy told me that the shop could pound out the dent and fix the tail light – for about 25% of what it would cost to fix it correctly (as in replacing the quarter panel and bumper). Then he told me that if he did it “on the side” he would only charge me the $500 the guy already gave me.
I guess that’s what I’m going to do. I hate hate hate hate putting more money into a car that has 111,000 miles on it, with a door that doesn’t latch in cold weather, a cracked front bumper (don’t ask), the word “Chodes” carved into the trunk (courtesy of the punks who lived near my old apartment), a cracked windshield and with new problems with the shift cable.
But it’s either that, or trying to buy a used car for about $1500 – which I could handle, but barely. Spending that money would leave me in a big bind in a few months. If I pay the body shop guy the $500 the other guy paid me, then I’m not out anything.
I came home and took a nap because I was just tired of thinking. And here is the 926th reason I love Indy so much. When I walked in the door, she just attached herself to me (which is rare these days) and purred like she did when she was a kitten. When I laid down on my bed, she curled up right beside me and didn’t move. When I got up and went to the couch to brood, she followed me and jumped up onto the arm of the couch, six inches from my face and purrrrrrrrrred. You can tell me cats are independent and only care about themselves … but I will remember what she did today. And I won’t believe you.
Well, shit, Cap. And fuck that guy boo-hoo-hooing to you about his financial situation after he hit you. Grrrr….
Hey Paws,
Your mantra isn’t wrong at all. It’s attitude that shapes reality. The thing is, you can’t ‘act’ the part to achieve it. The change comes from changing perspective and focus.
When you look hard enough for it, there’s always more blessing than problem in just about any situation. But you intentionally look for it and focus on it, rather than focus on the rest. Because the rest has a way of working itself out when you don’t let it consume you.
Sorry your car got head, but I am glad you’re still here to talk about it.
awww for Indy. and yay for you not being injured! but boo for idiot driver. glad you are ok.
Lass, I couldn’t get too upset about it. I mean, they call them accidents for a reason. It’s just that I really, really, really didn’t want to put any more $$ into this car. On the good side, no one was hurt and that was actually my first thought, instead of how inconvenienced I would be. Which is good. Right?
Bryan! I think you can act in a way to achieve gratitude. You’re right in that it happens when we focus on the good things. If I “act as if” I am happy and grateful, then I find things to be happy and grateful for … and then I become happy and grateful. And I’m really, really happy that no one was hurt. It could have been a lot worse!
Heather, that cat just makes me smile. I know it sounds crazy (and probably a little silly) but I think animals do know when we’re upset – and they stick by our side til we get out of the funk.
I’m sorry to hear that. Old cars suck. But then again, it’s probably better to be hit in an old car than in a new one.
I’ve always wondered how the Americans had the idea of “whoever comes first at an intersection drives first”. It’s totally misleading and leads to stupid accidents like this one. In Europe (yes I’m sorry I sound patronizing
) cars on the right always have priority over you, cars on the left don’t. So you just have to look on the right (in theory) without wondering who came first.
I’m glad you lied about the deductible, that was a great idea
Len, actually the car on the right does have the right-of-way. The idea of “whoever gets there first” comes from when two cars don’t arrive at the same time. I was traveling east and turning (left) to the north. He was heading west. Had he been going north (and to my right), he would have had the right-of-way. However, I was already at the stop sign before he got there. Either way, though, he hit the BACK of my car, meaning I was already in the intersection … he should not have started to move.
Had I been driving a brand new car – I would still be crying, 12 hours later. LOL
Bloody hell! Are you alright?? Not broken at all??
Sorry about the car – what a ball ache just when you don’t need it
Yikes! I’m glad you are safe and sound. Also, nice work on the $500 and finding a mechanic to get things working again for you.
DAMN girl! Of *course* he didn’t have insurance…asshat. But carrying $500 cash & can’t pay bills? Whatev. Glad you were thinking on your feet there, I’d have probably blown it. I totally believe animals can sense how you’re feeling too…glad you had company afterwards.
You ARE ok, right?
Penelope, I’m fine. For such an unlucky thing, it was lucky that it wasn’t worse. Shit happens … I just wish it would happen to other people.
Erin, it’s a good excuse to buy another car – as soon as I can. I should have my car fixed-ish by the weekend. Yay.
Tug, I know. As soon as he said that, I knew I was screwed. He was really working that angle, the fucker. Probably some of it was even true, I don’t know. I could sue him, but the car is worth next to nothing – literally. Yes, I am okay. Just irked, but hey, that’s par for the course
I’m sorry for your luck.
A guy at work (MikeO) had his car totaled Tuesday. Someone, on a cell phone, rear ended his wife — had she not had to make a quick walk back inside the house to pick up keys (because she was taking the car, not the van, because Mike had to take the van to get the tires balanced because the garage didn’t do it right the first time) she’d have not been in front of the minivan that eventually bashed into her.
Timing, as you pointed out, is everything.
Delmer – I’m just not going to drive on Tuesdays. Ever.
Oh man… that just sucks. I’m sorry, Cap. I really am.
Try not to have accidents.
(this episode of Useless Advice brought to you by the letter “J”).
Oh, man, whall … I wish you had told me that last Monday!!!